Change doesn't come easily
by srkaddict
Summary: Kakashi and Iruka are two single fathers and share a deep friendship, but Kakashi has a problem. He loves Iruka and this for years already, but he had shut his eyes to the facts. Only three people know about Kakashi's secret love to the Chuunin. Iruka who don't know about it, gets a problem and needs some help, but only one person can help him with it. What will happen?
1. Kakashi's Life

**Title:** Change doesn't come easily  
**Beta:** My best friend Ginger**  
Characters:** Katashi (Tashi) & Takashi (Kashi) (3 ½ years old, Kakashi's Sons), Itoe (2 years old, Iruka's Daughter)**  
Couple(s):** KakaIru, KakaRan (Past), IruSarana (Past)**  
Genre:** Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Family, Humor  
**Rating:** T (maybe M later)  
**Summary:** Iruka had really loved Sarana, but it wasn't meant to be. Kakashi loved Ran, unfortunately not good enough as he was supposed to, because he loved somebody else for years already, but he had shut his eyes to the facts.  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto…

**A/N:** I'm not the best writer, but I do my best. You will read some OC's. Don't like, don't read. OOC in some parts.

* * *

**Kakashi's POV:  
**A vague bang, a clank and a loud shout!

Kakashi startled and jumped out of bed, then he lost his balance, hitting the ground face first. For a small moment he saw stars. While he touched his nose to make sure it still was there he groaned and cursed relentlessly.

He let it become a habit to fall out of his bed early in the morning. He had stopped counting how often he frightened in the early morning, too early to his liking, that he jumped out of bed. He frightened so much then and within seconds he then layed on his face sprawled down the floor. To his own surprise his nose wasn't getting injured seriously, although he landed on his face so often. He gave himself a leg-up sluggishly and complete drowsy.

He stood there only in his black boxers. His hair stuck out in all directions and his mask had slightly slipped, but it didn't bother him. He sighed heavily and runs his fingers through his tousled and uncontrollable hair, while he was rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He yawned, plodded and lazily walked, step-by-step, through his bedroom to look after his sons and see what they had done this time.

Katashi and Takashi were two little devils who were very nerve-racking. He wondered whether he possibly was like this too, when he was their age. Kakashi asked himself how he did it all without losing his mind. He had never thought of being a single father one day. If someone had said it to him a few years ago, he would have declared all for absolutely insane. He and children…? No Way! In fact, he never could handle kids very well, but after he had own children now, everything was so much different. He would never have thought that it would feel so good to have own children and that it would feel so good to feel so much pride. He was so proud of his sons that he could burst out in loud joy. His sons were his pride and joy.

Takashi and Katashi were Twins and 3 ½ years old. They would turn soon 4 years old. Katashi was the first-born and was the older of them. Katashi has shoulder-length soft silver hair, sky-blue eyes and a pale skin. Takashi has short unruly silver hair, like him and just like his brother sky-blue eyes, only a little darker than that of his brother. It was surprising to see how much they looked like him. Actually, the girls come more after their father and boys more after their mother, but his sons are just like him, except their blue eyes which they have inherited from their mother. You look at them, and you see Kakashi.

Ran was slim, small and elegant. She had a pale skin colour like Kakashi himself, long soft dark brown hair, almost black and sky-blue eyes. She was a wonderful woman who was rather shy and very careful. She had a big warm heart and was honest, too honest, if one would ask him. She could read in him like in an open book and had confronted him with the pure truth and obviousness which he didn't want to see and has refused unwaveringly to agree with. He lacked the courage to do it.

And where did this direct face-off brought him finally? He was now a single father without having someone at his side. He was single and that for two years already. Ran had known that Kakashi loved her. Unfortunately not good enough as he was supposed to, because he loved somebody else for years already. Ran had noticed more and more that it got more and more difficult for him to fight these feelings and suppress this ardent longing and passion towards this other love. One day it became too much for her and she confronted him with it. She had loved him so much that she let him go. She let their sons stay with him, so that he wouldn't become an estrange father.

It was very hard for her to let him go, to leave him and their sons, but neither to her nor to him it wouldn't had been good to live on together. Especially since his true love belonged to someone else already. After she had laid it on the line she told him he doesn't have to fear that she will alienate his sons from him. She would have hated herself would never be able to forgive herself, in case she would take them away from him.

She wanted that her sons stay with him and that he raises them further. The only difference was he had to do it alone, without her. At that time she left with tears in her eyes, without turning around once again. She disappeared from his life and from the life of her sons. She had never shown up again. He knew precisely why she hadn't shown up again since this day. It already was hard enough for her to leave him and to let her sons with Kakashi. If she would have seen her sons further she had seen him too. She would never have been able to forget Kakashi once and for all, if she had seen him. And this was hurting him. It hurts to know, he was the reason for her big and unbearable pain, but what should he do?

Should they have lived on together though he loved someone else? Should he have hurt her even more than he had hurt her already? Should he have fooled himself furthermore? He just wasn't able to suppress this damned ardent longing to him any longer. Day-by-day his longing to him became stronger and more and more unbearable. The longing was so strong that it had hurt him already. In the end he always was thinking of him. No, it could not have gone on like this. If she wouldn't have left him, then they would have been together, presently and in that case no one would be happier. It would have been the opposite. He had been aware that he had to stay away from her, but he didn't want to separate from her because he really was afraid of losing his sons.

When Ran told him that he doesn't have to fear of losing his sons, who mean the world to him, he thought of having misheard. He was really terrified that he was left once again, but worst was for him to lose his sons. Never to see them again, not to take part in their education and not to see them growing up. It made his flesh creep and he trembled hard when he thought about it, to live a life without his sons, without having them in his life by his side.

He knew, if he lost his sons and had to live without them, he would become another person. He would return to his old self again, only much more badly and more darkly. He would cork up his feelings. Nobody would approach him again, his feelings would be pure ice and he would only go on missions in the hope that it was his last mission on which he went.

He shuddered once more about this awful thought and walked down the stairs which led into the living room. With cold sweat on the forehead he cautiously moved to the kitchen, where he expected the utter chaos.


	2. Takashi and Katashi

**Beta:** My best friend Ginger. Thanks so much sweetoo.

**A/N:** You will read a little OC's. OOC in some parts. Don't like, don't read.

"Speaking"

_'Thoughts'_

_Flashbacks_

_**Last Chapter:**_

_He shuddered once more about this awful thought and walked down the stairs which led into the living room. With cold sweat on the forehead he cautiously moved to the kitchen, where he expected the utter chaos._

Katashi and Takashi wanted to get the cereal off the shelf and had put a chair in front of the kitchen counter in order to climb on it better. Takashi climbed on the chair, while Katashi paid attention that the chair on the kitchen tiles did not slide away. Takashi always was very clumsy and therefore Katashi could foresee that something mighthappen. Katashi shook his head whilehe watched how carelessly his brother climbed on the kitchen counter. He wanted to facepalm, but then the chair would slide away and then something serious would happen. He didn't wantedthis.

His brother could still be so clumsy, but he didn't want to happen something bad to his brother. He loved his brother and his Dad, after all. He knew if something would happen to his little brother his Dad would freak out and that was anything but a sight for sore eyes. He shuddered and shook his head when he turned his attention back to his brother and watched what will happen. Takashi sat down on his knees and held on the shelf, when he grasped at the cereal with his other hand. Katashi knew it might easily go wrong. It looked as if he would pull down the shelf with him.

"Aaaaah!" shouted Takashi as the shelf gave way and all possible things were falling down.

"Kashi!" shouted Katashi startled, with beads of sweat on his forehead ashe saw the shelf was falling towards his little brother.

Katashi climbed as fast as he could on the chair and wanted to pull away his brother just as a full load of flour fell on his head. He coughed and sneezed as the flour fell on his head and waved his hand before his eyes to clean the air off the fine flour dust. When the fine flour dust had cleared again, he looked to his little brother who was fully covered with syrup, sugar and flour. In his face, on his head,and on his pyjamas. Takashi and Katashi had a flabbergasted look and theyguffawed.

Both didn't know that their father had woke up of the loud clattering, loud surprised shout and already was on the way into the kitchen. If they would have known they wouldn't had started laughing at all. They knew their Dad and knew only too well how he would react if he saw the utter chaos in the kitchen.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

With a fast beating heart and a last deep sigh, he walked the last steps to the kitchen and suddenly stopped dead in his tracks. His eyes widened as he saw the utter chaos in the kitchen. When Kakashi slowly looked around the whole kitchen, like in slow motion, his eyes fell on his sons who were looking at each other laughing. His sons were sitting on the kitchen counter, covered with syrup, flour, sugar and who knows what else.

Katashi was full with flour. Now his usually silver hair was white and from his face you could see no more of it because it was also covered with flour. One could think he would have wallowed on purpose in flour. His pyjama bottoms also were no more deep-blue like once.

Takashi looked no better either. He would even say that he looked even worse than his older brother. Takashi was covered with flour all over, sugar and…maple syrup? His hair stuck together by all the stuff. Also his pyjamas had no more the real colour from deep-blue. It had more syrup than flour on it.

Kakashi had to bite down on his lower lip to stop from laughing out loud. That was too funny for words. If he had a camera, he would have taken a photo of it immediately. It's a shame that he had just no camera handy. He leaned against the door framewith crossed arms, cool, nonchalant and briefly cleared his throat to let them know he stood in the doorway. His very amused face and impish smile changed into a very serious and warning glance which showed his sons that he wasn't overly excited about what just had happened in the kitchen. That they once more had tried to approach the cereal, although he had forbidden them to climb on the kitchen counter to get the cereal.

Both boys winced when they heard him clearing his throat. They immediately stopped laughing. For a short moment they stiffened and looked tensely at their father but thenlooked down immediately, because they couldn't hold his gaze. They blushed to the roots of their hair from embarrassment and were gulping hard. They didn't dare to look their father right into his eyes and held their look directed on the floor, waiting for the fact that their father would rant and rave at them.

Kakashi frowned, pulled up his eyebrows and looked questioningly at his sons. He waited for the fact that his sons would saysomething, but he waited in vain. Takashi and Katashi were quiet and looked bashfully at the ground when he pushed himself off from the door frame. He scratched childishly and sheepishly the back of his head and sheepishly smiled.

"Maa! Kashi, Tashi…what is wrong with you? Why these depressed faces?" he asked embarrassed, scratching the back of his head and looked at his sons.

Not the smallest movement. They only sat there, didn't say any word, did not move and were looking bashfully at the ground. He seriously asked himself what was wrong with his sons. Usually, they were not so quiet and would be apologizing, but this time? This time everything was different. Kakashi became anxious and panicky and shifted from one foot to another. He went lazily and achingly slow towards his sons.

"Guys! C'mon! Say something. I don't care what you say, but please, please say something. Anything!" His voice changed from worried to comforting, when he stood before them, looking at them. Nothing! Nothing at all! Kakashi let out a frustrated sigh when he lifted his hands to lift the chin of his sons, so they were looking him right into his eyes.

"Are you possibly afraid of me?" he asked with gentle and quiet voice. His sons chewed on their lower lip, slowly nodding.

Kakashi let his hands sink and put back his head. He sighed deeply and bent forward to look Tashi and Kashi in the eyes once again. He kneeled down and laid a hand on each knee of his sons.

"Maa! There is no reason of being afraid of me. I am not mad. I know that I sometimes look frightening, but the last I want is that my own sons are afraid of me. Afraid of their own father." He explained in a quiet, honest however serious tone.

Takashi and Katashi slowly raised their head and looked him into the eyes. While Katashi looked at him seriously, Takashi looked at him with tears in his eyes. Takashi was more emotional than his brother, who was rather hard and cold. Katashi was tough on the outside, but soft on the inside. It was rare for him to show his feelings openly, while Takashi always showed his feelings, what he had inherited from his mother.

"Maa! Look at you. You both look bad." Kakashi got up, reached out his hands and lifted Takashi off the kitchen counter. He put him down when he lifted Katashi likewise from the kitchen counter.

"Go, clean yourselves and change clothes." Kakashi said with severer voice and pushed his sons easily at the back out off the kitchen.

"Off you go! Shoo!" He quietly laughed when his sons looked questioningly at him over their shoulders.

"Maa! I'll take care of the mess in the kitchen." Kakashi shook his head when his sons nodded and ran away to clean themselves and change in some new clothes.

Kakashi turned round and looked one last time at the complete chaos in the kitchen. He sighed deeply and murmured a quiet "Bunshin No Jutsu". Three other Kakashi's appeared to which he gave proper instructions what to do. Kakashi looked down at his self and sighed, as he found out that he was also covered with all possible things.

_'No Wonder! I have to get dirty myself. After all I have lifted the both off the kitchen counter.'_ Kakashi scolded internally.

Kakashi went back to his bedroom to go to the adjoining bathroom. He took a hot shower and had to scrub a little to remove the sticky liquid of his naked upper body.

_'From whom they probably have this? Not from me!'_ Kakashi thought.

When Kakashi had showered, he wrapped a deep-blue towel around his hips and run his fingers through his still wet hair. He went back to the bedroom and dressed. He decided to wear a deep-blue sweatshirt and black wide tracksuit bottoms. After changing clothes, he grabbed his Hitai-Ate and covered his Sharingan eye with it.

He had taken off his mask for a long time and threwit together with his black boxers, in the laundry basket to wash them later. He lived with his sons in the house of his father what lies a little distant, which is why he wears his mask only seldom at home. He didn't have to worry about the fact that somebody could see him without his mask.

He had always kept a mask in readiness, if somebody would visit them who don't know him yet without his mask. There were only very few people who have seen him without his mask already. Naruto counted to the people who have seen him without his mask. Naruto had seen his face only through a mischance. Kakashi burst out laughing when he thought back to it. He shook his head and went back to the kitchen to look how far his clones have come. After his clones had cleaned up the kitchen it sparkled again. He dissolved them and prepared the breakfast.

While he was preparing the breakfast, he heard the giggling of his sons and the running water in the bathroom. He dropped his shoulders sighing and shook his head. He put the cereal with the milk on the dining table and made a proper omelette for himself. He put twoglasses of fruit juice on the table, which his sons drank and a cup of coffee for himself.

Kakashi decided to look after his sons whether they have already cleaned themselves or if he still had to help. Kakashi was not surprised that his sons were well advanced for their age. When he was at their age he was well advanced, too. He was much too far developedfor his age for the simple reason that he was highly gifted as a child. He had wished his sons wouldn't follow in his footsteps and weren't so much far for developedtheir age. They were too far for their age, actually.

Katashi was with his 3 ½ years already a little genius, maybe even a bigger and better genius than he was at that time at this age already. Takashi was also much far for his 3 ½ years, but was not such a big genius like his brother. Takashi was with his clumsiness and full of energy rather like a second Naruto. He had definitively too much energy and keeps him and Katashi always on the go.


End file.
